Wednesday, February 24, 2010

ASSHOLICS ANONYMOUS--> Attention Bad Boys of the World: I Just Realized- I CAN'T Fix You...

A friend of mine asked me a few weeks ago if I am only attracted to assholes.  After swallowing my champagne (and my pride) thoughtfully, I said "Well, I don't think so...or at least I didn't know they were assholes when we first met..." Or did I?  A recent encounter has left me wondering why I keep doing this to myself. 

Have you ever found yourself saying or at least thinking the following things?
"This time is different.  He would never do that to me."
"He has totally changed since last time we dated."
"He is just scared, so he is pushing me away. That's all."
"He is so damaged- but I really think I am THE ONE to fix him."
"I have heard bad things about him, but he is really different around me."
"I don't believe what everyone else says...he seems sweet."

Did you answer yes to 2 or more of the statements above?  If so, you are not alone. 

Welcome to Assholics Anonymous
"HI! I'm Mademoiselle Hautemess, and I'm an ASSHOLIC.  Whether it was an emotionally abusive asshole and I convinced myself was just pushing me away because he loved me SOO much -OR- a best friend who convinced me he had feelings for me in order to hook up- I love assholes.  I don't WANT to be treated poorly...but I want to fix them.  I want them to be different for me.  I want to tame the wild beasts.  And instead, I usually wake up in a puddle of my own mascara tears with a wine hangover."

So EFF YOU, Carrie Bradshaw! In real life, Big would never have flown to Paris for you. And when he left you at the altar, he would have married the next 24 year old that came along.  Everyone repeat after me: BAD BOYS CAN'T BE FIXED... well, except this one...JUST KIDDING!


  1. The funny thing is - I still have times when I think, PJ loves ME and I will fix him! Yes, I will take the straw hat and tassel shoes from him and make him into a great man. Guess what....ain't gonna happen. I to am a Assholic!

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