This clip makes me laugh every single time I watch it. And rather than bore you with another day of "Poor Me. I can't keep a man," I will hopefully entertain you with the comedic genius of someone else.
"What are you doing? What are you doing? WHAT, WHAT, WHAT are you doing? Put that tub of ice cream down, Haute Mess...what do you want to blow up like Jennifer Love Hewitt? NO! You are going to go all ugly over some boy who plays the FIDDLE? I don't think so! You're a Stupid Bitch!"
Please reply in the comments section with your own "Sassy Gay Friend" advice! I mean- I DID finally give in and eat a half pint of ice cream last night...and cheese fries. So much for the break up diet!