- Started but not finished books on my nightstand? 4
- Seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer that I own and have seen each episode at least twice? ALL, 7 out of 7.
I am a 20-something girl who drinks at least 1 alcoholic drink approximately 4-6 days per week and pride myself on going from Friday to Monday without washing my hair- and it is rare that I shower at all on Sundays. I have an above average sense of humor and am particularly drawn to dirty jokes- I can tell you the meaning of at least 90% of the gross, deviant sexual terms you come up with. (Dirty Sanchez? Childs play. Mexican Avalanche? Duh! Rusty Trombone? Don't insult Me. Angry Dolphin? My impression rocks. The Houdini? Makes me laugh every time.) I have never and will never allow you to perform any of these acts on me, but I will drop them into conversation every now and then because I am immature like that. I have at least 10 pairs of underwear that you will never see. I "play sports" and "work out" 5 times a week or so- but let's be clear, I am not skinny or athletic. I have broken 4 bones all in non sport related injuries. I fall down my stairs enough that I specifically forbid my hardwood floor guys from removing the carpet on the stairs because it "pads my fall." I am in no way, shape, or form athletic. And just because I work out a lot and run half marathons does not make me skinny. I will never be skinny. I may be "curvy," "hourglass," "healthy" body type, but this may be the hottest I will ever be. When we go out, I will outdrink you, outshout you, outsing you at karaoke, outsmart you, outdance you, and outsex you....and if I dont, I will still claim that I did.
What I Am Doing with My Life:
Just enough to make it hard to find someone to date but not enough that I don't still have time to write this.
I like to read...magazines, gossip blogs, and Twilight or Harry Potter books make up 90% of my pleasure reading. I read like 3 smart books a year...and then I ride that train as long as I can so that my Favorite Books list doesn't still include R.L. Stine.
I watch almost as much TV as the day allows...sometimes I will waste an entire Sunday in front of the TV. I like The Office, Modern Family, and Arrested Development. Beyond that- there is not a single show that I want you to watch with me, unless you get really into Soap Net or the CW or dating competition shows...in which case, I will likely stop being attracted to you.
Movies...I love movies, but I don't love the movie theater. It is expensive and you can't pause it when you have to pee...and I refuse to buy a small diet coke when the large is only $.50 more. My favorites are impressive- I like cool movies: Goonies, Labrynth, Mallrats, Clerks, Dumb & Dumber, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, The Prestige, The Notebook, Harry Potter, Twilight...it goes on and on. But very important to note: I don't like war movies or bloody movies. So I have not seen Braveheart- get over it. I don't want to watch Saving Private Ryan again. And I fucking hate Pulp Fiction- gave me nightmares about gimps for weeks. Find boys to watch those movies with you. I would rather bake cookies...and eat them all.
I eat everything. Literally. (especially when I am drunk)
The First Thing People Notice About Me:
From the front or back? Front: My massively loud voice...like Austin Powers when he wakes up from suspended animation.
Back: My Kim KardASSian booty
6 Things You Couldn't Live Without:
Diet Mt. Dew
What Am I Looking for in a Partner?
Not a hillbilly
Wants to have fun, party, and be awesome
Wants to hang out with me at least a couple times a week
Doesn't want to hang out with me every day
Has good teeth