Monday, October 4, 2010

Accidental Post about Children...The Pull Out Method of Blogging

The excerpt below was written early last week, but I ran out of time and didn't  know how I wanted to finish this little story off, so I scheduled it to post "in the future"- expecting to get back to it.  OOPS! One day when it asks me how blogs are made and if it was a mistake, I will just look it in its eyes and say lovingly, "Oh sweetie! You were an accident, but not a mistake."

Enjoy my little "accident"!

----------Original Accidental post-------------- 

More reasons not to have children...


When we were growing up, things were so much simpler.  After watching TV and talking to friends who are either with children or want to get pregnant, I realized that there is SO MUCH MORE SHIT to worry about these days than when we were little.


1. Autism- apparently like everyone is autistic now.  From 2002 to 2006, diagnosis went up like 57%...fucking shoot me now.  First you have to worry about chicken pox, then H1N1, and other curable short term illness....but also there are permanent issues on the rise.
2. Peanut allergies - they practically hose kids down outside of daycares now to make sure no peanutbutter residue transfers from little Jack's lips and finger to Allergic Allan's dainty little body.  Because that shit is deadly, apparently.
3. Sexting - being a teenager is tough enough without the fucking world wide web being connected to your little cell phones...now imagine finding sexy pics of your 13 year old saying she wants to lick something like a lollipop....I mean, who am I to teach them not to do that shit.  I fucking drunk dial like its my job.  I have done made so many bad fucking decisions...but I can't imagine watching a little thing that I am responsible for making them right in front of me.
4.

------End of Original Post-------

Now, I shall finish my thoughts in this very brief list- the final point was inspired by Paige's comment:

4. Mom hair cut- I can already feel myself getting stuck in my current look.  I think one day my stylist is going to be like, "Listen, remember when the 'Rachel' cut was really cool in the 90s but then in the 2000's it wasn't?  Yeah.  That's sort of what you have going on here."  I can only imagine how much worse it would be when I am all like, "Yeah, I have no time for this hair- cut it off.  Give me something sensible that won't get in my eyes but I can still pull back in a ponytail..." BOOM! MULLET.

8 comments:

  1. And don't forget that having kids makes your tits droop.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Seriously, what did we do to provoke nut allergies? And why does everything 'may contain nuts'? Even apples. It's a sick world.

    ReplyDelete
  3. having kids means you'll inevitable get the "mom" hair cut

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  4. Was this posted accidentally?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yep...i pre-wrote it a while ago, planning to finish my thoughts and scheduled it to post "so far in the future, I'll for sure finish it..." OOPS!

    ReplyDelete
  6. There is no way I'm having children. Today's world is hard for me and I'm almost 30. I didn't even have Facebook in college, thank God. I had a pager in high school! Today is way too scary and it's only going to get worse.

    ReplyDelete
  7. having kids means you'll inevitable get the "mom" hair cut

    ReplyDelete
  8. Seriously, what did we do to provoke nut allergies? And why does everything 'may contain nuts'? Even apples. It's a sick world.

    ReplyDelete

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