Tuesday, March 15, 2011

In Case You Didn't Know: Happy Belated π Day!

(ok, I started writing this yesterday ON 3/14 and got busy...so it is a little late, but it's the thought that counts!) (if you want to get pissy about it, then "Happy Ides of March, Brute!"!

HAPPY π Day!

March 14th - 3.14 and at 1:59 it was even more awesome....

Yes, I know I m reaching but you have to celebrate the little things in life.  The stretch between Christmas and my birthday is painfully long so I have created several makeshift filler holidays.  I figure, if HallMark can do it, I can too!

While sharing the Happy π Day greetings this morning, it dawned on me that perhaps not everyone universally understands/enjoys celebrating the mathematical constant whose value is the ratio of any Euclidean plane circle's circumference to its diameter.  Losers!

Top HauteMess (a.k.a. Future Hallmark) Holidays:

1. Pi Day - Celebrating a mathematical constant that sounds exactly like PIE is fun.  Here's how it works: you shout "HAPPY PI DAY!" to coworkers, strangers, anyone in general who very likely doesn't get what you are talking about...then you eat pie. Easy, right?  I basically eat pie twice a year, and Thanksgiving is the other time.  So last night I enjoyed the most delicious pecan pie with homemade whipped cream - I'd say it was a success!

2. Jello Shot Easter Egg Hunt: Yes, Easter is a real holiday, but the Saturday before Easter is not.  SO I made my own! It is called "Jello Shot Easter Egg Hunt."  The name is quite self explanatory.  150 plastic eggs filled with jello shots are hidden strategically around my house.  Teams of 2 bring special "Easter Baskets" - prize given for funniest - and they must find and eat as many jello shots as possible.  The one catch is that you must eat the shot immediately upon picking it up and placing in your basket...and if you puke, you lose. So there really is a bit of strategy involved.  It is a deliciously naughty holiday that involves my favorite things: day drinking, jello, and bunny ear accessories!   And before any of you bible beaters start casting stones, just take a good hard look around your house...if there are bunnies, chocolate, or eggs (cadbury or otherwise) - then you have bastardized the holiday just as much as my Adult Egg Hunt.

3. Flying Pig Day: Cincinnati has an annual marathon called "The Flying Pig."  Apparently someone was all like, "Yeah. I'll run a marathon when PIGS FLY! Ha ha ha." Or whatever.  Regardless, I have never missed a chance to celebrate either by running in the race and hosting an after party at my house that includes throwing back Jameson Whiskey at an alarming rate or drinking an annual serving of vitamin C via Mimosas.  When not running, I wake up a 7am, pack a backpack and fill a sport bottle with booze and walk to my friends' house for a Marathon & Mimosas cheering party.  It is a magical dichotomous day in Cincinnati - celebrating the healthiest people in the world and with day drinking and shouting!

4. Lizzie Borden Day: I basically invented this holiday when I was in middle school and my mom purchased a set of antique cookie cutters.  One of the shapes was a hatchet!  I picked it up and inquired, "Mom, what are you going to use this hatchet for? Lizzie Borden cookies?? BAHAHAH!"  Then I thought to myself, "Hmmm....mmmm....hatchet cookies with strawberry blood spatters. BRILLIANT!" And I immediately shouted, "Can I have the hatchet?"  I think my mom briefly feared for her own life, probably thinking, "Why is my daughter so interested in cookies that celebrate a woman who brutally stabbed her mother 20 times??"  And then the cycle was complete.  "Lizzie Borden Cookie Day" was born. 

I am sure there will be many more to come...do you have any favorite faux holidays?


  1. I'm SO coming for the egg hunt.

    Brilliant, sweetness.

  2. love love love the egg hunt idea !!!! that sounds like sooo much fun !!!

  3. I'm SO coming for the egg hunt.

    Brilliant, sweetness.



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