Pardon the interruption of your regularly scheduled drunken hijinks and gratuitous cursing for some more deep musings of mine.
Recently, I heard someone say that true love can't possibly exist unless it is returned. I happen to disagree. I believe that true love is at its most pure when it isn't returned. (before I start sounding TOO deep...let me clarify that I heard the statement on an episode of Vampire Diaries)
I, of course, am speaking from personal experience. I was deeply, deeply in love once. Mr. Apathetic was gorgeous, muscular, funny, hard working, and I never stopped feeling grateful that he chose ME. I loved him unconditionally.
During the tenure of the relationship, I was mostly happy...but just unhappy enough. I'll spare you most of the details, but during the breakup he said "I just know that I can't make you happy long term. Honestly, I never felt like I was enough for you."
Ouch! I wish that was the first time a man had said those words to me. I don't exactly know why I have that effect...but that is another post for another time.
Anyhow, I know that we aren't meant to be together...he was emotionally withholding and that made me incredibly insecure. We were sort of a mess towards the end. The break up was the right thing. We have both moved on.
But still, to this day, I love him. I like sometimes like to call myself a "High Functioning Miss Havisham."
I hold absolutely no illusions of being with him. I don't even want that anymore. He has a new girlfriend, and they are very serious. Recently, I saw him at a party with her, and he didn't even say hello. He has no place in his heart for me.
However, if he asked me to, I would walk six miles in the rain to hold his hand at a hospital. I would take off work to sit with him if he was suffering. I would be there for him if he really needs me. I would do those things because I'll always love him...without hope or agenda. (and I stole that line from one of my favorite movie scenes of all time - from Love Actually, one of the BEST movies of all time).
Maybe its because I haven't really loved anyone since him...and maybe its because we ended on good terms and I don't HATE him, which is rare in my love life. Either way, it still supports my thesis that true love CAN exist even when not returned. It is because I expect nothing in return that it is so pure. It's not the crazy passionate "in love" type of love...but its love nonetheless. (Boom! take that, Vampire Diaries writers)