It was a typical Friday night at bar Landmine with the girls. We were enjoying our table in a prime location for maximum people watching. Then a clean cut (i.e. shaved bald), slightly pudgy guy walks by us in the bar and stares me down...
Me: I think that guy just eyefucked me.One hour later...while splitting a large cheese pizza at the late night pizza parlor. (don't judge us!)
CalienteMess: Yes, BUT he is wearing major cargo shorts. Sick.
Me: *dreamily* Yeah, but he looks like he probably eats pizza when he's drunk.
BlondeMess: Probably a safe bet.
Me: Hey look - it's that Cargo Shorts Guy from the bar! I KNEW IT! I knew he eats pizza when he's drunk.They say the words you speak when you are drunk are your secret desires...Apparently, the most important quality in a life partner is what he eats when he's drunk.
BlondeMess: Ha! Yeah. OK - I've got to go. You guys ready?
(as we are cleaning our table and standing up to go)
CalienteMess: Let's go.
Me: Buh... uh... *crestfallen* But what if he's my soulmate?