Friday, August 26, 2011

Mute Math, Aziz Ansari, and Another Ex Gets Engaged!

Since I have been insanely busy (lazy) this week while traveling up and down the Eastern Seaboard faster than Hurricane Irene, I present you with a Highlight Reel:

Mute Math:  
If you have never seen Mute Math live - you must drop what you are doing, go to ticketmaster or whatever site you prefer, and purchase tickets immediately.  They are incredibly high energy, talented, and HOT.  I have always been in love with the lead singer, but last night he was looking extra tasty and extra talented.  Mademoiselle BlondeMess and I sweated our faces off while realizing that we were the only two girls in the 250 person venue who weren't with boyfriends.  So, I just imagined myself betrothed to the band...

Aziz Ansari:
After mistaking a random man on the train for Stanley Tucci earlier in the day, I was skeptical when I saw a small Indian man walking towards me....but after staring for an uncomfortable amount of time, I determined that the man was in fact Aziz Ansari.  He was just strolling down 3rd Ave in the Lower East Side, basically begging for me to join them. (He had that look in his eye, "Hey! Tall lady...come with us!")  Yet, when I did an about-face and started following him, Mademoiselle BlondeMess grabbed the back of my collar like a Mama Cat wrangling her kittens.  So I didn't get a chance to meet him or let him buy me drinks all night...but in my mind, I did.

Good Luck Chuck (HauteMess) Strikes Again:
I can make ANY man get the next girl he dates after me.  Mr. Apathetic just got engaged.  I am honestly happy for him.  I decided that it was all too much to keep in and allowed myself to feel sorry for myself for 10min only.  So I went into the bathroom at Senorita CalienteMess's New York Apartment and cried silently for 10min, wiped my tears, and got back into bed to start a new day.  I am NOT sad because I miss him or it should have been me.  But it is really really hard not to question my own value and what may be wrong with me...I mean, a girl can only send so many men into the arms of his future wife before questioning if she is doing SOMETHING wrong.  However, SisterMess assured me that no one man I have ever dated was special enough...and that special guy is out there priming himself for me.

So I am not worried about myself or my future happiness, because I know that I am like wine & cheese! (I get better with age)

Happy Weekend! 


  1. As I've mentioned before, I'm in the same Good Luck Chuck boat. And here's some sap for you. (Straight from my mom.) We girls that send men into the arms of their future's because we made them grow up and show them what they want in life. Which, she says, is a good thing.

    Either way, I'm all for starting a marriage making business. Let's do it. 

  2. Aziz is the shit! I love him on Parks and Recreation :) Two of my exes got married this summer. I went to one of the weddings because we're actually really close with each other still. He's my boy-best-friend, haha. But the other ex...not so much. Probably because I dumped him for his bad teeth. Yep, I'm a horrible person like that.

  3. SisterMerryHellishAugust 26, 2011 at 10:02 PM

    There are so few women like you (and me occasionally) who make men better for dating us.  Unfortunately, they know that WE know how imperfect they were before, so they leave us and marry the next girl, who can't believe how lucky she is and thinks he was just born that awesome!

  4. I am at the point where I am willing to profit from this "gift'!!

  5. Hilarious...and tiny!

  6. Not horrible whatsoever!  Just honest...orthodontia is too affordable to ignore.  I dated a Brit with bad teeth...still haven't lived that one down!

    And Parks & Rec is my new jam...he is so amazing!

  7. Awww - that made me smile...and simultaneously feel sorry for the girl with the diamond. LOVE YOU!!!  Thanks! :)



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