Tuesday, September 6, 2011

As Promised, Calamity Should Be My Middle Name

I mentioned last week that Senorita CalienteMess and I were participating in the Cincinnati (charity) version of "The Amazing Race" dressed as "Black Swan."  While preparing for the race, we had to decide who should be White Swan and who should be Black Swan.  After CalienteMess hit me with her car Friday night, (as her car rolled backwards down my hill, her open car door assaulted my hip in a big, ugly, purple bruisy way) it was sealed that she would be Black Swan.

As predicted, we won the costume contest and the cash prize that came with it!  However, it appeared that we were the ONLY people to get the Costume Contest Memo...in a see of runners wearing the obligatory blue race shirts, our black and white tutus stood out like sore thumbs.

I knew it without the cash prize and accolades, but those certainly helped confirm that we were dressed as Psycho Ballerinas for a 100 Degree Weather Race because we are awesome.

Also as predicted, in addition to being hit with Black Swan's car, I was injured DURING the race.  In the first 15 minutes of the race, I tripped over some raised concrete because I couldn't see the ground under my large, puffy tutu. (#singlewhiteswanproblems)

I went flying into an intersection on the same side as my bum hip - catching road rash from my thigh to mid calf.  Blood just ran down my leg for the next hour as I hobbled through the city.

Some of my favorite comments from the random pedestrians we zipped past as we ran through Downtown Cincinnati dresses in tutus, were:
  • "Did the Black Swan do that to you??" (when people saw my leg, they assumed Black Swan had pushed  White Swan.  My blood and battle scars became an amusing accessory to our already stellar costumes!)
  • "Please don't go eating more people." (When they saw CalienteMess's fast transformation into Zombie Black Swan as the 100 degree heat melted the black makeup all down her face.)
I am quite proud to announce that we finished the race in 15th place out of 90 teams!

After that performance, I tried to take it easy this weekend - resulting in way fewer blog stories than I hoped.  BUT it did give me a chance to finish Season 4 of SKINS UK. (and by finish, I mean purchase it on iTunes since Netflix didn't have it, start it, and finish it within 2 days)  I could start an entirely new post about how obsessed I am with Skins and how I am such a nerd who is so 5 years behind but still living vicariously through those Brits....but I won't.  I'll save that for another rainy day.


  1. That. Is. HILARIOUS!  I mean, I hope you're alright, but you girls are a riot!    I applaud your creativity and moxie!


  2. Way to go! I'm going to be the black swan for halloween!



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