Thursday, July 5, 2012

So I'm A Little Rusty

This past weekend I was hit on for the first time in eons.  My response?  I laughed out loud in his face (twice) and walked away.

In my defense, it was 11AM in the baking aisle of the grocery store, and I was desperately searching my iPhone to make sure I had the right ingredients to make vegan cupcakes... AAAAND dude was cheesy as fuck with his line, "Hey! Looking good.  You even have your phone out, ready to take my number." How could I NOT laugh at that??
But still, throwing Crisco in my cart and walking away isn't exactly something I am proud of.  I should have at least thrown back some smart ass reply.... Like:

"Really? Has that ever actually worked for you?"
"Seriously? Did that just happen? In the grocery aisle?"
or even "I don't take numbers from men. But you can have mine. The name is Winnie. And my number is five one three eight six seven five three zero nine. Last name is Cooper."
>Note: that was my old college go to fake number - most guys were too drunk to realize until the next day they look at their phones and saw "Winnie Cooper 867-5309." When you say "zero" instead of "oh" - they forget that it is a popular 80s song about a girl named Jenny...and Jenny was apparently pretty popular in the bathroom stall phone directory. And Winnie Cooper? Well that was basically just a sobriety checkpoint for a guy. If he heard the name Winnie Cooper and didn't immediately think of The Wonder Years, then fuck off. AH... life was so simple back then.

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